House Sole

The first thing you should know is that most people playing World of Warcraft are terrible at video games, especially World of Warcraft. Every Nintendo owner has encountered the following scenario: You hand over the controller to a friend and then watch them clumsily murder Mario with the same bottomless pit until he stops coming back to life. World of Warcraft is an entire society of these people.

Here’s where it gets tricky. When you tell 25 people to go to The Caverns of Time, seven of them don’t know what that is, two of them aren’t playing anymore, one fell asleep in his pizza, two have to drive their kids to therapy, one tells you to shut the fuck up, four are rebooting their computers, one is getting kicked off by his parents, two are lost foreigners who thought this was the train station, one is pressing enter on the same Chuck Norris joke over and over, two of them tell everyone to go to three different places and one is your girlfriend bitching at you about how much this sucks.

Ninety minutes later, when you finally get everyone there, someone will explain that no one should stand in front of the demon lord Kaz’rogal. This simple concept will take 40 minutes to convey, and repeat twice. During this part, you may want to take advantage of my “Learning with Super Mario Brothers” system for Overhauling 6-Cylinder Transmissions.

Then, after your beard has grown in and your marriage has fallen apart, you give the signal to begin the battle! Within moments, 15 people are lying in various states of liquid directly in front of the demon lord Kaz’rogal. As for the other 10 people, hey, they didn’t know you fuckers were starting.